Reader

Back in July i told you something wasn’t adding up.

Smart people. Years of experience. They knew their stuff inside out.. and still went blank the moment everyone looked at them.

I said i’d share where that question led me.

So here it is..

Picture this:

You’re in a leadership meeting. Things are going fine.. then an executive turns to you and says,

“So where are we on the timeline?”

You know the answer. You were working on it yesterday.

But before you even open your mouth, something happens.. so fast that you don’t notice it...

a thought flashes through:

“if i get this wrong, they’ll think i’m not ready for this role.”

then your heart starts pounding
your throat gets tight
your face gets hot.

And then you do what you always do..

You rush through the answer. You over explain. You give way more detail than anyone asked for. Or you say “let me get back to you on that” and move on.

Afterward you’re sitting there thinking:

“I KNEW that. why couldn’t i just say it?”

Now here’s what i want you to notice..

The only thing you remember is the racing heart and the rushed answer. So that’s what you try to fix.

Breathe deeper. Slow down. Be confident.

BUT by the time your heart starts racing, the first dominoes already fell:

- the situation (executive asks a question).
- the thought (“they’ll think i’m not ready”).
- the feeling (heart, throat, face).
- what you did (rush, over explain, back off).

Most people spend years trying to catch the last domino.

Very few ever slow down and look at the first two.

And frankly speaking..

that’s where my work with clients starts. Not with your slides or your delivery skills. But with seeing your own sequence clearly.. what sets it off, and what you tell yourself in that split second before your body reacts.

’cause you can’t change something you’ve never actually looked at.

I put this into a short guide:

Page 6 has a simple exercise where you write down your own sequence from a recent meeting (takes about 2 mins)

>> Get the guide here <<

It won’t fix everything in 9 pages..

but will guide you see the part of your reaction that’s been happening too fast to notice.

When you’ve filled it in, hit reply and send me what you wrote for the thought.

I read every reply and i’ll tell you what i see.

-waqas

PS--The thought line is the hardest one to fill in. Most people write a feeling there, like “i felt nervous” or “i panicked”. That’s normal.

The thought is usually a full sentence. And it often starts with “if i...”

Root Before Skill